Namaste? More Like GaGa-ste.

 

This week got off to a great start. Sarah's efforts to change her identity didn't go much beyond a little hair dye, but I loved how she has been keeping herself fit. Although I think I would have preferred this guy to her grisly Guru.

Especially after the fuzzy little foreigner blew up my man Rick's spot for checking out Alison's "bum."  

 

In the end that cockblockin Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting looking mother fukker got his. 

Later on Sookie asked Bill if they were at war- and, like war, this installment was rather chaotic.

After Pam finally caught up with Eric to close out True Blood Season 7 Episode 2, I hoped we would get some clarity as to how he landed himself in his current predicament. Instead, we got a series of disjointed flashbacks that I guess were supposed to explain why Eric had seemingly given up on being immortal.

We were introduced to Sylvie, who Eric was apparently in love with back in 1986. Their moonlit coitus was interrupted by Nan Flanagan.

With Tru Blood set to make its debut, she was there to rein in freewheeling vampires like Eric. Nan had heard he was "tall" but Eric of course exceeded expectations. The partnership with the corporation stood to make The Authority a fortune, but only if vampires fell in line and ceased feeding on humans in plain sight.

 Pam immediately had her guard up, but Nan didn't.

 

We all know from seeing Nan's "taste in women" in past seasons just how she meant she and Pam could have been friends.

In typical Eric fashion, he told Nan what he thought of her warning, but Pam could read the writing on the wall.

She pleaded with him to run away with her and not jeopardize their life together for a silly girl. Now where have I heard that before?

Eric, of course, did not listen and was forced to choose between his progeny and his human lover when they were taken by surprise. Sylvie lost her life and Eric was taken away in silver, along with Pam. My guess is from there he walked the line The Authority set forth for him, took his place as sheriff and opened Fangtasia to usher in the sale of Tru Blood.

I loved everything about 80's Eric and Pam, so much so I couldn't help myself and made this.

The Eric we saw in 1986 was more reminiscent of the Eric we have grown to love... who served as a stark contrast from the Eric we saw back in modern day. Pam, however, was (thankfully) unwavering as ever. She did acknowledge that she felt Tara meet the true death, but did not falter from her search to find Eric searching the world over.

In one last effort, she mentioned the one name that would rekindle her maker's fire. The knowledge that Sarah Newlin was still alive did the trick.

Pam, she did what she set out to do and, as Eric rose from his chair, my hopes for the season were also lifted. Oysters anyone?

Back in Bon Temps, Violet gave a pep talk of her own to Jason. It's all well and good that he wants a family some day, but his timing could not have been worse to broach the subject.

At first I thought Violet's answer to him was rather cold, but she was right to tell him he needed to man up. She called to mind the men of her past in times of war, imploring her lover to be a warrior as they were in the face of adversity. Jason didn't totally abandon his point, but his overall response was I'm sure what she was going for.

Violet wanted him to put aside human emotion in this time of crisis and that is just what she herself did when she agreed to shelve her beef with Jessica until they made sure Sookie was safe. She then took that commitment to another level when she defended Jason and Jessica by disemboweling Mrs. Fortenberry. This Mortal Combat "Fatality" finishing move has become quite popular.

While everyone else was confronting reality head on, Lafayette and James were coming up with ways to escape it.

I'll never be mad at a scene where we get to see Lafa dancing in all his glory but playing chemist with James, which was genius, - along with others like the conversation between Willa and the reverend - just served to make the episode very choppy.  Lafa and James especially seemed out of place given what was going on in the world around therm, but maybe that was the point. While everyone else was getting the taste slapped out their mouths by reality, these two were tripping balls on a pharmaceutical pleasure cruise. I also know the story the good rev was telling Willa was supposed to be touching, but I just felt bad for the guy if Lettie Mae was his savior. And now because she can't get her shit together, he had to kick the only person who could protect them out of the house.

The result of which left little time at the end to see Sookie's poorly thought out plan backfire, which of course resulted in yet another major death.

I don't care how well Bill covered their tracks, Sookie should have known Alcide was going to come looking for her. And fearing the worse, you know his head was going to be clouded, leaving him vulnerable.
Case in point: he was arguing with Bill about Sookie the moment he was shot. Had Sookie appealed to the man she knew loved him and made him see her point of view, Alcide could have been part of the plan and might very well still be alive. Jessica offered to turn him, but she herself was also nearly lost. She still was not healing which seems to be from her lack of feeding.

Regardless, I am a seller of the entire Sookie and Bill reunion. The same goes for Bills's familial flashbacks as he sat perched in that tree while he and Sookie played Edward and Bella.

Alcide will be missed, certainly in the ongoing fight against the infected vampires, but also in the hearts of fans everywhere.If I looked like him, I would walk around in perpetual slow motion as well.

R.I.P. big boy. You deserved better.

Shaken and Scurred

Somewhere, Steve Newlin's spirit shed a tear as Eric made his return on True Blood Season 7 Episode 2... via Jason's steamy dream.

Having been brought back from the brink of death by everyone's favorite Viking, Jason's subconscious showed it was still under the influence of Eric's blood.

Right about the moment I swore to never eat another carb, Jason woke up in a church pew (of all places), bringing the episode back to Bon Temps. Did you catch Jason's little glance at his junk after waking up from the dream?

Sam and the others struggled to figure out their next move with regard to the infected vampires who attacked them. Interestingly enough, when we caught back up with the nesting nasties at Fangtasia, it became apparent that they were actually pretty organized compared to those they terrorized the night before.

Despite their hopeless situation and absolute disregard for human life, the infected vamps actually had worked out a pretty 'civil' arrangement amongst themselves. Their division of labor, so to speak, provided a glimmer of hope for Arlene and the others held captive when they recognized the new reaper Betty.

Persuading Betty to let them go was a long shot, but Arlene was not about to die in that basement after everything she had already been through.

This was one of Arlene's best episodes. My hope grew along with hers that she would make it out. That was, of course, until Betty turned into a pile of goo while feeding on her. That was the antithesis of the "fake chow." 

Maybe it was the Hep-V that melted Betty or maybe we saw just why all Arlene's relationships have ended poorly if you catch my drift.

 

The Hep-V claimed another victim and possibly Arlene and the others's best chance for escape.
Team Sookie could still save the day, especially with Jason on the case.

"So we now know the victim's name was Amorfa?" That was vintage Stackhouse, as was the scene in Saint Alice where he showed off his pizza/forensic skills. The look Andy gave him was priceless. 

I loved how he kept eating the slice of pizza as they continued to search the house.

Sookie reading the diary was a good idea, but with time of the essence, it would have been prudent to start with the last entry and then work backward if needed. Of course had she not snooped back to earlier entries we would not have learned about the similarities between the two women and/or had reason to flashback to the night Bill took Sookie to Fangtasia. If you ask me, it was a waste of valuable screen time as this pretty much sums up my reaction to the scene.

What really struck me about the scene, though, was the entry where Mary Beth talked about crushing up some pills and dying alongside her baby. She noted her doubts that her daughter's life would be spared. This entry - along with the various messages we saw written around the town - did well to paint a picture of the utter despair and desperation that gripped Saint Alice in its final hours.

The images also brought back to mind similar ones seen during Hurricane Katrina; a reminder of how many felt their government abandoned them in that time of need as well.

Lettie Mae was in need of something all together different and went to extreme measures to get it after her visit with Lafayette proved fruitless.

I loved hearing him call her a drug addict through and through and a trifling bitch to boot... but did he miss what sounded like a confession by his strung out Auntie? It sure sounded to me as if she admitted to killing Tara right there.

While one mom was reminding me why she is my least favorite character on the show, another started making some sense and snuck in the most surprising performances of the episode.

Yes, Maxine Fortenberry stole the supporting role spotlight with a number of scenes. My two favorite were her NyQuil distorted account of Sam their "dog bear" mayor outside her home and her comment about Adilyn.

 

 

It was the second reference to Adilyn's rapid growth of course. The first being the funny father/daughter exchange earlier outside the church.

Lastly, we got the reunion we had all been waiting for. There have been many theories as to how Eric may have escaped the predicament we last saw him in. Part of me thought we were going to see a crispy bacon version of him being nursed back to health... or perhaps Pam would find him buried deep beneath the snow in need of a serious shampoo and facial.

However, seeing the signature Hep-V roadmap making its way up his chest was not one of the scenarios I had envisioned and absolutely floored me as it did Pam.

If anyone can save Eric it will be Pam. You can do it Pamcakes! You've got to!

Jessica also appeared to be suffering from some bizarre symptoms as the bite marks on her arm had not healed as they should have. I won't be able to handle losing both Eric and Yessica. Nah baby, I'm not gonna be able to do it.

Bon Temps is going to Hell in a hand basket and no one may be safe. Not even our supes. I'm putting on a good face, I'm not scurred, but should I be?

Do you think Eric is a goner? Do you think they are setting up Sookie and Bill to end up together? How did Eric contract the Hep? Get at me with answers! 

Place is Dead Anyway

Moments into True Blood Season 7 Episode 1, fans were hit with the first of what will surely be a multitude of shockers, as Tara was lost.

It happened so fast I hardly believed it to be true. One minute she's protecting her mother and the next she was a pile of goo. Sort of reminded me of my early dry hump sessions in middle school.

Surely her mother was mistaken and that was some other vampire's blood all over her.
As the episode progressed, though, the sad truth set in. While very little time was given to Tara's actual departure, a number of scenes dealt with the way news of her death was received.


Tara's mother was over the top as usual, but could she have been the one who possibly killed Tara? Sookie seemed more annoyed with Alcide than saddened by the loss of her friend. I'm sure she'll deal with the reality at some point, but for the time being her head was a bit preoccupied with all the nasty thoughts of those around her. Well that and having some good ole make up sex with her man. I'm a Jess-man, but dang Sookie looked good, I can't deny it.

Jessica showed the most surprise over the news, but she too had little time to mourn as she was busy keeping Adilyn safe. I liked the scene where the two girls put aside their differences and forgot for a moment that they were in the middle of a supernatural war, to just be girls again and talk about boys. Then that Hep V vamper with the overactive salivary glans showed up. What followed was one of my favorite scenes.

Adilyn eventually invited Jess in to protect her from the sun. Despite having not fed for some time, she resisted the urge to feed on what we know is like vampire crack. Good on ya Jess!

 

Jason took a moment to think back to when they were all kids before also being called into action.

The lack of any serious collective bereavement seemed to emphasize just how mad a scene it was out there. There was little if any time to stop and take stock of all those who died. Those who did risked joining them.

Lafayette had the chance to speak his mind once he got home, thanks to James, who I'm sure you noticed was replaced with a new actor after the one from last season left the show. Very similar to the situation on Game of Thrones with Dany's main squeeze Daario Naharis.

 Lafa actually expressed his relief at losing Tara this time around, having mourned her death once already. 

As he and James smoked, James shared the story of the night he was made.

Interestingly enough, it was during the Vietnam War. Having just seen countless men and women slaughtered, James hearkened back to another dark time for America. Also interesting to note was the way James paused when describing the relationship with his friend from across the street. I got the impression the two were romantically involved, hence the homophobic slur the angry father called James as he beat him. I wonder if this was a hint that James and Lafayette will end up together, opening the door for a Jessica/Jason reunion down the road.

Lucky for Jason, he didn't have to wait that long to cure his blue balls, as he showed Violet the long "arm" of the law after giving us he first memorable quote of the season.

I guess she fell for the "banana in the tailpipe."

 

Overseas, things seemed just as chaotic in the dark corners where Pam searched for information about Eric's whereabouts. I was pretty sure the man she was squaring off against in the game of Russian (Moroccan?) Roulette was human. Especially with the way he spoke about his god contrasted to the way Pam spoke about hers. In the end I was proven wrong, but still was treated to quite a scene full of memorable True Blood quotes delivered as only Pam can.

 

 

 

 

Pam probably won't find religion, but she needs to find Eric - and quick. I'm sure she could care less about Sookie and the others, but maybe she will at least want to avenge the loss of Tara. I was surprised they didn't show her reaction to feeling her progeny being killed. Maybe there was no vampire wifi in Morocco.
If the people of Bon Temps are going to have any chance, they need both Pam and Eric in their corner.
A solid start to the final season. With the end in sight, I'm sure we are in for quite a ride on our way to a collision course with the series conclusion.